Overseas Travel

If you expect the trip to China to be a trying ordeal, it will be. If you approach it with an open mind, and look at it as the trip of a lifetime, you'll find it's a much more pleasant journey. Allow yourself a little adjustment time for culture shock. China looks different, smells different, and for perhaps the first time in your life, you'll be in a place where you are definitely the minority. Generally speaking, the Chinese people are very friendly and curious. Despite their portrayal in Western media, the Chinese people their love children. They won't hesitate to mildly scold you if they feel your child is not properly bundled (Chinese babies are commonly wrapped up in several layer, head to toe, regardless of the weather). Close to the megacities, such as Hong Kong and Guangzhou, there is a good deal of public awareness of the international adoptions, and people will often approach and say how good is that the children are getting "good mamas and papas." Deeper in the country, where the reach of the international media is not so strong, there is less awareness, so there are sometimes questions and double-takes when residents see Caucasians walking around with Chinese babies. But there is rarely, if ever, animosity. Just try very hard not to be the "ugly American" and you'll be fine.

Gotcha Day

The whole reason for the trip, and the culmination of months of effort and paperwork, occurs soon after your arrival in China. Within a day or two of arriving in the provincial capital, you'll meet your new child. This day will be your child's "Gotcha Day,", be celebrated as the day that she or he joined your family. The presentation usually happens at your hotel, but it occasionally takes place at the orphanage itself. You are given your child and hour or two of private time, and then you'll complete the paperwork from the orphanage. These first few hours can sometimes be trying. This little person may have journeyed hours from the orphanage. They've been handed over to people that look, smell, and sound very different from anyone they've ever met. While most children begin adjusting and bonding within the first few hours, some take much longer, particularly if they've been in foster care rather than an institution. Be patient. Cradle her with the love that prompted you to take this journey. Be mindful that some children are not in perfect health. Hopefully, you've packed the recommended medicines to take care of all but the most serious conditions (see the recommended packing list at www.fwcc.org) . Many children have colds or other infections. Some may have scabies or lice. Chances are, if you don't have what you need, another family in your group, or at you hotel, will be willing to share with you. Most people adopting from China travel in groups of families, so there is always some support and camaraderie between families. These are people who are sharing a life-changing experience with you, and will likely become long-time friends.

The Flight

The flight to China is long. If you live in the Midwest, you'll likely leave from a hub city, such as Chicago or Detroit. Usually your first stop will be Tokyo, though there are a few direct flights into Beijing, Guangzhou, Shanghai and Hong Kong. This first leg is usually 11 to 13 hours. On both our trips, our next stop was Hong Kong, another four hours from Tokyo. Generally, you'll have at least one or two more flights to get to your provincial capitol, but on both of our trips we were able to get a night's sleep in a Hong Kong hotel before flying again. You'll also switch from an international carrier, such as Northwest or JAL, to a domestic carrier, such as China Southern. If you have a choice in airlines for the trans-Pacific flight, I would recommend JAL (Japan Airlines www.jal.com). We found them to be more courteous and pleasant than Northwest. And on a trip that long, every little consideration counts. Make sure to pay close attention to announcements and signs at the airport, as the English spoken on the PA is often heavily accented and hard to understand. On our last trip, we know of at least one family that boarded the wrong flight because they misunderstood the announcement (Nanning, Nanjing, and Nanchang sound a lot alike!). Jet lag is unavoidable and expected. I found it much harder to adjust when returning from China. General information is to allow yourself a day of recovery for every time zone you cross.

Be prepared for a tearful reunion when you return home. When we last traveled, it was still possible for family and friends to wait at the gate for arrivals. When our flight finally arrived (after United's two-hour delay from O'Hare), the scene was so emotional that there were people crying who didn't even know us, but were waiting to board their flight.

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